Looking at Our Own Stress Cues
Other people can often detect excessive stress in us before we note it . in ourselves. Let us look at a few cues that most of us can perceive in ourselves. Irritability is an indicator that a stress level is being exceeded. Make a note of those things that irritate you only when you feel tired and you have a useful cue. Bad decisions made time after time may indicate excessive stress. We all, of course, have trouble sleeping at times, but when sleeplessness goes on night after night, stress may be related.
When annoyances seem to accumulate in a concentrated period of time, stress may be involve~-the incessant talker, the rattle in the car, the proposed date that gets turned down. If we can take the confusion of four people in some setting, but feel overcrowded when a fifth person enters the situation, then we have a cue in numbers. If we can determine how long we can sit in traffic before getting tense, we have another cue to our stress threshold.
Cues to determining one's stress level relate to our defenses. Under what conditions do we refuse to admit some reality that is unpleasant? When do we experience a renewed anger just by thinking about things we can do nothing about? When do we look for socially accepted ways to let off steam? Cues to stress come to us more ofteh in terms of feeling rather than in an intellectual way. How do we usually feel under this situation or that condition? In short, if we can establish base lines for our usual way of feeling or behaving, we have comparisons available to us to indicate excessive stress. And it is important that we determine whether we are "internalizers," turning anger and other feelings inward, or "externalizers," expressing our frustrations on people or things outside. The externalizer often gets quicker knowledge of his condition than the internalizer because the outside world has a way of biting back. If we are the type who pressure-cooks problems inside of us or seem geared to explode at a high adrenalin level, we should try to know it and make adjustments accordingly.
