Saturday, July 2, 2011

After Remarriage how to begin with blended family?


What is a Blended Step Family?
A blended step family occurs when multiple families are united, usually through a remarriage of one or both of the parents. It is estimated that as many as 50% of first time marriages end in divorce each year. Being part of blended step family is now more part of the norm than ever before in history. Half of all children will be part of a blended stepfamily by the time they are 18 yrs. old. If you find yourself and your family in this situation, you know the challenges step families face.

Remarriage and Blended Families

Remarriage and blended families are so common that it is considered normal by most people. Parents who remarry are ecstatic to begin bringing their new blended family together under one roof. Dreams of family outings and just spending quality time together are spoken of between the new couple. Just because the parents may be happy does not mean the children are jumping for joy. When asked what a blended stepfamily is, each family may have a different answer. This is normal because each family is unique. There are and never will be two families that are exactly alike. This is what makes us all unique and human. There is no right and no wrong why to being a happy blended family.
Each new family will have its good times and bad times. This is a new experience for all those involved including the natural parent and the stepparent. There is no woman out there that wants to be considered the wicked stepmother, but it happens to the best of us at times. Blended step families will adjust to the new living arrangements. Susie and John who are now living in the same house as siblings may not agree, but in time things do work out. Rivalry among the children is quite common and is normal. Even natural siblings fight and argue, and this is a whole other ballgame. Teens learning to live together within the blended family will certainly try to buck the system at times.
With each family finding their way and bonding, it is very important to have family traditions that are unique to the new family. Some of the traditions can be carried over from the other households, but this family will need their own as well. It is amazing to watch how fast children pick up and cling to certain traditions. This is very common around the holidays.
Being a happy blended step family will take time and there will need to be adjustments along the way. No family will just come together and live happily ever after without some sort of chaos. If anyone thinks this is going to happen, they are in for a huge surprise. There will be jealousy, sibling rivalry, anger, fear and guilt. Keep in mind that these emotions are also seen in families where there is no divorce. Blended family statistics reveal that 50% of all first marriages end in divorce. Another amazing fact is that in second marriages, 60% is the divorce rate. Blended step families are everywhere. Find one that you admire and ask the members how they managed the transition. You'll probably learn something new and make some great friends in the process.