Improve Your Sex Life in 5 Simple Steps

If sex with your partner isn't what it used to be, simply hoping it will improve isn't likely to work. You need a plan. That's why we talked to sex experts and real couples to find out how you can put the "bang" back in banging.  Use their tips below, and then check out the rest of the stories on this page. From fun, sizzling sex positions to new bedroom "techniques", you'll find everything you need to blow her mind—and have her moaning for more.
1. Try Anything Once
You'd think the sexual repertoire of couples would broaden over time, but it actually tends to narrow as comfort sets in. That's why Lex and Leslie have a pact: Nothing is off limits. "The last new position we tried was where Leslie was on her back with her legs curled up so her ankles were near her head, and I was positioned above her," says Lex. "We joked about her being a contortionist, but she really liked the intense eye contact it provided." Novelty ignites passion by increasing your brain's levels of dopamine, a neurotransmitter linked to romance and sex drive, says biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, Ph.D. Fisher has been studying relationship biology for more than two decades. "So if you keep doing things that are new and different, you have a better chance of sustaining the romance," she says. Okay, but how do you get your partner to don a Catwoman suit and purr? "Just ask," says Lex. "Make sure she knows you don't expect her to do it ever again. And be willing to do anything for her, too. Once."

2. Pump Yourselves Up
Exercise works wonders not only on your body, but also on your woman. "Vigorous activities, such as jogging and spinning, release endorphins that improve your mood and relax you," says American Council on Exercise spokesman Gregory Florez. "In the hours following 30 to 40 minutes of cardio, skin temperature is elevated and your sense of touch is heightened. It's a great time for intimacy." You may not even need to shower first. "Sweat is an aphrodisiac," says Florez, who is also the CEO of FitAdvisor.com. "The smell of perspiration from a clean person is arousing. Postexercise, your brain is in a state of  hyperarousal, and your body may be as well."
3. Break out the Games
Remember those innocent teen games, such as truth or dare and spin the bottle? Embracing them now, only not so innocently this time, can reignite your fire.
Jon and Susanna, a couple for 10 years, have sex with Parker Brothers all the time. It's not as kinky as it sounds—they trade Scrabble points for 3-minute sexual favors. "It can be a massage, kissing, oral sex, talking dirty, a dance, whatever we want," Susanna says. "Last time we played, Jon asked me for a striptease. I made him think I was going all the way—but I stopped when I was down to my panties." The game is all about the tease. "Scrabble kicks up our ETS—estimated time for sex. The game disintegrates slowly, usually when one of our trysts becomes about getting the other person off."
Psychiatrist and sex therapist Barbara Bartlik, M.D., explains why silly games lead to crazy sex: "Bringing an item into the bedroom, like a board game, forces you to think about how you're going to use this item to make the experience different. Whoever dreamed up the idea feels triumphant, while the other person feels well attended to. These positive experiences feed our relationships and make love last." Whether it's Scrabble or Battleship doesn't really matter. "The best thing is, it takes the guesswork out of communication," says Jon. "It gives us structure, and it's fun to have a built-in forum to ask for what we want sexually."

4. Schedule Sex by the Hour
Better sex will lead to more sex, says Dr. Bartlik. So forget the quickies, and love each other longtime. Consider making an appointment that neither of you is allowed to cancel: Lie in bed together for 1 hour on a weekend morning. You might just chat, or you might rock the sheets like porn stars. Either way, you're connecting. Let's say you're like Brian and his wife, Mary—you don't necessarily have the luxury of a lazy Saturday morning. "When we first met, we had sex every day," says Mary. "But we're parents now and don't have as much time. Now it's just once a week. But with an hour or two of sexual activity, it's always amazing and meaningful."
Having been together for 10 years, the couple lets the anticipation build with extended foreplay that can last as long as an hour. "We start slowly—mostly just hands, bodies, and mouths everywhere," Mary says. "Eventually, we move into all types of sex—fast, slow, gentle. Brian tries to hold out an hour before we explode." More of a 5-minute man than a marathon man? Try these stamina boosters from Barbara Carrellas, author of Urban Tantra. "Stop stroking or thrusting your penis for 10 to 20 seconds. Relax completely, take your focus away from your genitals, and instead focus more on your breathing."
The best way of all to avoid premature ejaculation? "Relax, breathe deeply, and slow down," Carellas says. "This is easier in a passive, receptive mode, so let her be on top. Ask her to stop or slow down before you reach climax. She can continue to touch and stroke you all over your body—except for your penis, that is."


5. Plan an Excursion
For Lesley and Tim, sex isn't just part of a vacation: It's the very reason for the getaway. Travel is usually the most draining aspect of time away, but this couple actually plans trips around where and how they might have sex along the way. Recent exploits for the couple, together for 4 years, included oral sex on a flight to Aruba, and sex under a blanket on another flight—this one to Bermuda. "There was nobody around, and we tried to stay inconspicuous," Tim recalls. Rather than dampening sex drive, the possibility of getting caught can send sexual desire into overdrive. It's why the Mile High Club is such a non-exclusive fraternity.
Luckily, you don't have to fly to a far-flung land to take your sexual satisfaction to new altitudes. "Surprise your partner on a random Monday or Tuesday," suggests Megan Andelloux, director of the Miko Learning and Resource Center, in Providence, Rhode Island. "At dusk, blindfold her and lead her to the car. As you drive to a remote location, her excitement will build. When you arrive, take off her blindfold and spend lots of time making out in your car before relocating to the backseat.
"Even if you end up just 2 blocks from home, the sex will be worlds away."

How to find your Dream Lover?

Still searching for "The One"? Start using the 3 strategies below to boost your odds of meeting the right girl for you. Then check out all the stories on this page for tons more useful dating and relationship advice—from making the best first impression to figuring out if she's a keeper. You can be sure the woman of your dreams is out there: Now follow our advice to make sure you find her this year.
1. Build Your Romantic Network
To be successful, you need to continually meet new people outside your existing circles in order to find quantity and diversity in new links. All connections have potential. For example, you may have written off your buddy with a wife or live-in girlfriend, but he's the money ball. According to a 2003 study in Social Networks, dating couples share 20 percent to 25 percent of their friends, but that percentage increases to 50 when they start living together. The result: Your friend's network is likely to be populated with more women after he moves in with her. And that bodes well for your odds: A recent study found that you're 227 percent more likely to meet a potential girlfriend through a friend or family member rather than in a bar, at the gym, or on the street. Are you keeping in touch with all your buddies? You should be.
2. Let Chaos Be Your Wingman
Northwestern University researchers tracked the movements of 100,000 cell phone users for 6 months. Their finding: People are predictable. Nearly half of their human lab rats kept to a maze that was little more than 6 miles wide, and 83 percent mostly stayed within a 37-mile radius. And they tended to spend the majority of their time in five or fewer places. The result: dating pools the size of shot glasses. If you stick to a 6-mile orbit, your romantic trajectory is stunted as well. "In the stock market, diversification is critical to reducing risk," says Amir Aczel, Ph.D., a former professor of mathematics and statistics at Bentley University near Boston and author of Chance. "In dating, the same rule applies. You should vary the places you go, and when you go there. This will result in increased probability of meeting women who respond well to you."
3. Stop Sitting at Home 
The single women are waiting, but they're not doing it in front of an LCD screen, where you're more likely to be most nights. On any given day, more women attend or host social events, volunteer, join religious functions, practice hobbies, or go shopping, while the average single guy is home, pathetically alone. Compared with single women, single men spend 45 minutes more a day watching TV and about 20 minutes more on the computer. If you shut down socially during the week, you're severely undermining your efforts and personal satisfaction. You'll have more success with women if you aim to collect experiences rather than phone numbers.

Turn Her on With Scent

I love when a man is well-groomed, but I don't want him to wash away his individuality. There is such a thing as too squeaky clean. I'm not scared of flavor. Besides, whether a man is sexy doesn't begin in the details of his grooming. It might end there, but that allure originates inside him.
I love when a man smells amazing. I've turned my head many times when a guy passed me—even if I didn't think he was attractive—because I caught a whiff of him. Do you know that book Perfume? I totally got it, I understood why fragrance made the guy insane. I love how no man can smell the same as another; everyone is an original combination of a natural body scent, cologne, deodorant, with pheromones sprinkled on top. That can be a shortcut to the heart. When I smell certain colognes, too, it brings me right back to a certain man or a time or a love.
It helps if he isn't obsessed with grooming. Johnny Depp embodies the golden mean of looking fabulous and looking like he doesn't give a damn if he looks fabulous or not. There's no bigger turnoff than vanity. Most women don't want to hang out with a guy who talks for hours about his own watch.
Beyond that, I find it hard to prescribe rules. I like what men come up with on their own. I mean, I can name a few things I don't like. The unibrow. I don't love it when guys over-tan. I'm not into big logos or bling. And my biggest pet peeve is when men get their lips puffed. But rules in general cut down on originality, and even if it sounds corny, there's a reason God made us all different. What one girl passes over, another girl likes. For example, my friend covets perfect teeth, which is something I don't care about. Basically, when I go out with girl friends, we all look in different directions.
I'm not proposing rank clothes and greasy hair. (Or, as I see all the time in L.A., guys trying so hard to look messy they look over-styled). I love a dirty rock-star only to a point. Natural is cool; unsanitary is scary. The unwashed-bohemian thing sometimes comes off slutty, not sexy. If he's too dirty, you can practically see how many women he's slept with.
Grooming is icing on the cake, but a girl should look at what's underneath. What I want is soul. And that comes from a guy"s honesty about himself. A goatee looks good if the man likes the goatee. His comfort and sincerity show in his body language. He'll be confident—and confidence trumps any product on any shelf.

Want to Impress Women: You Need 4 Things to Do

You probably already know that ladies have an eye for details. Men, not so much. In fact, we polled almost 1,000 women to find out which details men often miss in their daily grooming regimens—and found out that most guys are barely skimming the surface. Here are the top offenders and tips on tackling each one.
HAIR: Draw the Line
What you're missing: You sculpt the front of your mane with the scrutiny of an IRS auditor, but the head hair you can't see could cost you: Three-fifths of women say wayward fuzz sours desire.
Why she notices: Sloppy neck hair can make you look instantly disheveled, says Michael Moreno, a stylist at Chris Chase Salon in New York City.
Groom to improve: Define your back forty with a 5-minute DIY clip job once a week. Remove the guard on a pair of hair clippers and lift the hair at the base of your hairline with one hand so that the roots of the regular locks are protected by your index finger. Keep the blade head horizontal to your neck and, working from the bottom up, follow your natural hairline. Don't buzz on faith; check your progress with a hand mirror. Winging it isn't good enough, says Moreno. "You have to see what's going on back there."
FACE: Dig Deeper
What you're missing: A third of women say men don't care enough about their complexions.
Why she notices: "A man's pores are about 25 percent bigger than a woman's," says dermatologist Kenneth Beer, M.D. That means bigger blackheads can form on your nose.
Groom to improve: The plug's black color isn't dirt; it's the oxidative response of the oil in the clogged pore interacting with air. A daily wash is not enough to evict the more subtle squatters. "Bar soap won't cut it," says Dr. Beer. "Instead, pair a daily salicylic acid-based cleanser to exfoliate the skin with a weekly clay mask to purge impurities." Try MenScience Microfine Face Scrub or Lab Series Skincare for Men Oil Control Face Wash.
BREATH: Tame Your Tongue 
What you're missing: Even mildly stinky breath can be a dealbreaker for more than half of women.
Why she notices: You think a Tic Tac will suffice in a pinch, but her nose knows better: Some research has indicated that women can be more sensitive to scents than men are, so they may be more likely to detect even subtle mouth odors—bad news for suitors with less-than-fresh breath.
Groom to improve: Attack the tongue; it's where many halitosis cases stem from. "Most people don't think about their tongue when they're taking care of their teeth," says Kevin Sands, D.D.S., "but it harbors bacteria." Brushing your tongue will remove 40 percent of the offending volatile sulfur compounds, according to Brazilian researchers, but better yet, use a tongue scraper (like GUM Dual Action Tongue Cleaner, $3) and you'll remove up to 75 percent of the bad guys.
TEETH: Even Out the Edges
What you're missing: Unevenly bleached teeth are a bigger turnoff than an off-white shade that's uniform across your smile, said women.
Why she notices: Even minor deviations in color can amplify the contrast between the shades.
Groom to improve: Coverage is key; strips and fixed trays don't adequately cover your teeth, missing the crevices in between. Choose an at-home whitening kit with custom moldable trays, which will help evenly distribute the bleaching chemicals for consistent coverage. We like the Rembrandt 2-Hour Whitening Kit.

Sprints and Pushups for More Strong Muscles

Perform a series of 30-second sprints 3 days a week and you could gain the same cardiovascular benefits as someone who does 40 to 60 minutes of endurance training at a moderate intensity 5 days a week, research from McMaster University shows. This workout adds pushups to keep your upper body active. "It's an efficient workout for burning optimum calories in a short amount of time," says New York City trainer Jason Gerhart, C.S.C.S. Place a set of 15-pound dumbbells at the far baseline of a basketball court. Sprint between the home baseline and each mark, stopping to perform the pushups described below. Find an empty ball court and try it twice a week, with a day or more of rest in between.
1. At Half Court: Leg-raise pushup
Assume a standard pushup position. Lower your body, and then, at the bottom of the pushup, raise your right leg up behind you -- keeping it straight -- so it's slightly higher than your body. Push back up, then lower your leg to the start. Repeat with the opposite leg, doing 5 reps for each leg.
Targets: Chest, shoulders, triceps, core, glutes, lower back  
2. At the opposite free-throw line: Triceps pushup
Assume a pushup position but place your hands closer than shoulder-width apart. As you lower yourself, keep your elbows close to your body. You should feel tension in your triceps. Repeat 10 times.
Targets: Triceps, shoulders, chest
3. At the opposite baseline: Pushup + curl and press
In a regular pushup position, rest your hands on two dumbbells. Perform one pushup. At the top of the pushup, jump your feet in toward your hands, and keep your abs braced as you stand up. Curl the weights, and then push them above your head in a shoulder press. Immediately drop back down into a pushup position. Repeat 10 times.
Targets: Chest, shoulders, triceps, hamstrings, lower back, abs, biceps
4. At your final baseline: Pushup with hip rotation
Perform one standard pushup. Then move into a down-plank position, dropping your weight onto your elbows and forearms. Rotate your hips to the left until the front of your right hipbone is just about to touch the ground, and stop. Come back to center and repeat with your left hip to complete the rep. Alternate between pushups and rotations for 10 reps.
Targets: Chest, shoulders, triceps, obliques, abs, lower back

Men Grooming Tips

An increasing number of men are making grooming a priority because they want to maintain a youthful appearance and a winning edge. Statistics show that men in the United States are spending more than $4 billion a year on grooming products, such as haircolor and facial scrubs, driven by their desire to look and feel their best. The growth in grooming products is being fueled in part by baby boomers entering middle age.
Top Grooming Tips for Men
Get Rid the Gray Hair 
The fastest way to take years off of your look is to get rid of gray hair. It s less noticeable and more natural to begin coloring your hair when you first begin to go gray. An easy-to-use product formulated specifically for men, such as Just For Men Haircolor, can be used at home to cover gray hair with natural looking results.
If your beard and mustache turns gray first, the makers of Just For Men Haircolor have a brush-in gel in a no-drip formula that s perfect for covering facial hair.
Go Short if You re Balding 
Balding is another common problem among men. Opting for a comb-over just dates your look. Get comfortable with your changing look and opt for a modern short haircut.
When men begin to lose the hair on their heads, they may begin to notice unwanted hair in other places, like their nose, ears or back. Be sure to trim or wax unwanted hair for a clean, contemporary look.
Protect and Pamper Your Skin 
The best way to prevent wrinkles and skin cancer is to protect your skin from sun damage by using a daily moisturizer with sunscreen.
A good daily skin care routine includes cleansing, followed by a gentle facial exfoliant scrub, which also enhances shaving ease and comfort. Follow with a moisturizer containing sunscreen for day and at night a moisturizer with AHAs to encourage skin regeneration.
Pay Attention to Hands and Feet 
Don t forget to include your hands and feet in your grooming routine. Well-manicured nails and toes contribute to good hygiene and grooming habits. Make time to clip and file your nails at home.
Foot odor is a common problem among many men, and is relatively easy to treat. Scrub your feet daily and dry them completely. Insert a pair of Odor-Eaters Insoles into your shoes, which will absorb wetness and odor.
Quick Grooming Tips

• If you don't iron your clothes, remove them immediately from the dryer so wrinkles don't set.
• In hot weather, wear light-colored, cotton clothing and socks. This will absorb less heat and "sweat stains" will be less visible.
• Consider trimming your arm pit hairs in warm weather. Less hairs, less bacteria, less smell. Think about it.
• Don't be reluctant to trim or tweeze any stray eyebrow hairs.
• Good dental hygiene means a dazzling smile.
• Open your eyes. If hair is the frame for your face, the eyes are the windows. Use eye drops to whiten the whites of your eyes for a fresher, younger look.
• Extend the Life of Your Razor Blades 
• All you need is a bottle of mineral oil and some rubbing alcohol. 
• After shaving, thoroughly clean and dry your razor blades and then completely immerse the razor head in a shallow dish filled with mineral oil. Use the rubbing alcohol to wash away the oil next time you need to use the razor.
• By immersing the blades in oil, you stop the oxidization process that dulls their sharp edges. A daily mineral oil soak can double or even triple the life of your cartridges.Grooming Tips For Men