Much information is available to educate a pregnant woman about how to care for herself as her body mysteriously goes to work at creating a new human being. Unfortunately the same can’t be said for the expectant father. Expectant dads are often at a loss for what they can or should be doing during their partner’s pregnancy. They instinctively know they should be doing something – but what exactly that something is can remain fuzzy.
And although a dad doesn’t share the same physical transformation as his partner does – unless you consider counting sympathy weight – he has an important role in the pregnancy process that can significantly affect the experience of his partner. Pregnancy brings completely different experiences to women as some women love all the changes their bodies go through while other less fortunate souls are left to suffer through this seemingly never ending 9 month journey. Either way the expectant dad or partner can contribute in a significant way to the improvement of whatever experience the mother is having by being there for her.
The main role a partner plays during pregnancy is that of support person. So essentially this means that they take their cue from the woman who is going through pregnancy. This is because different women need different levels of support and the only way to figure out what your partner needs is through open communication.
Listen to Her Complaints Without Judgement
Sometimes a woman just needs someone she can complain to. She may be thrilled to be pregnant and over the moon about the idea of bringing a child into the world, however pregnancy can also be hard physical work for some women and it needs to be acknowledged. So when she needs an ear to listen to how much her back hurts or how tired she is, listen to her and don’t dare insinuate that she shouldn’t complain.
When it comes to her worries, respect her need to voice her fears. Pregnancy often makes women more emotional and it is easy to be confronted by valid fears related to losing the baby or having a baby born with problems.
Offer to Do More Around the House
Some pregnant women have endless amounts of energy – although truthfully they fall into the minority. Most women are tired during pregnancy, especially during the 1st and 3rd trimesters.
If you see your partner struggling to get through the day at work and then barely making it through dinner at home, offer to take on some of the household chores that she is normally responsible for. As unpleasant as it may be for some expectant dads to have to do more, just think about how tough it is for your partner to have to function while experiencing nausea, vomiting, extreme fatigue and a sudden weight gain of 30 pounds.
Ensure She Has Healthy Food To Eat
If your partner is so sick or tired that she can’t take care of herself it is your job to ensure that she and therefore baby, get nutrients by a steady supply of healthy foods. If you can’t cook yourself ensure you find locations where you can purchase healthy to-go foods or enlist family members and friends for help. You can offer to pay for groceries if they donate the cooking time.
Reassure Her Without Being Asked
One of the unexpected aspects of pregnancy is that it can make many women feel vulnerable. Firstly a woman’s body is changing in seemingly impossible ways, and this can make many a woman feel insecure. Some worry if their partners will still find them desirable, others wonder whether or not they will ever get their pre-pregnancy bodies back. Either way reassure your partner about her continued attractiveness. Let her know you love her and care for her no matter what happens during these 9 months. Tell white lies if you have to – most pregnant women welcome the self-esteem boost.
Secondly, pregnancy magnifies the fact that a woman is and will continue to be completely responsible for another human being. And even though this is normally a good responsibility, at times it can be daunting. Comfort your partner by telling her that you are in this together and that you are there to help her every step of the way physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually.
