Attraction and Adolescence
After some purely trial-and-error pracedure, seme dauble dating, some pairing aff frem a gathering, ar some computerized search, people really come together through same mutual attraction. From a variety of studies of "liking" and "disliking" come some useful generalizations. First, there is a tendency for people who like each other to mingle in graups, thus providing pairing-off opportunities. Second, empathy plays an important role as we come to share the other persan's feelings. Third, the greater the similarity of attitudes, the greater will be the attraction. Fourth, people tend to assaciate with others whom they perceive as similar to. themselves, though when persons are secure about being liked, they are willing to associate with others who are dissimilar. Fifth, the highly defensive persan tends to. be attracted to someone like himself, although he may say' just the opposite. Sixth, the nondefensive persan is mare outgoing and adventurous, and hence has the opportunity to become a member of several groups. Seventh, agreement in thinking is a factor in staying together, when offset with a small amount of in-fighting. Studits show that happy couples "think alike" more often than do unhappy couples. Studies of divorced people also show that when physical attractiveness was the primary reason for marriage. the give-and-take of reciprocation was lacking. Eighth, attractiveness relates to reinforcement. We tend to like persons who give us rewards at the right time. Ninth, popularity among college students relates to the psychological climate (see page 408). Tenth, attraction relates to similarity of interests over a fairly wide range.
