Where is Romance in your Love?

What brings two people immensely close to each other is the tender yet deep emotional, sexual and spiritual recognition and regard for the value of another person and relationship called ‘Romantic Love’
Extremely powerful yet unexplainable, Romantic Love sometimes tends to generate deep sufferings when frustrated, it’s like an emotional storm that sometimes becomes just impossible to control but where it brings an ocean of profound longings and desires, it also brings with it some unexplainable moments of fulfillment, satisfaction, ecstasy and joy.
“Someone we love enters the room. Our eyes and heart light up. We look at this person. We feel a growing feeling of joy within us. We reach out and touch their hand. We feel happy and fulfilled.”
When a man and woman encounter each other in midst of love they seek intimate contact. In a general sense, love is a response to something we intimately value. Romantic love is the experience of joy in the presence of a loved one, joy in being close to a loved one, and joy in our interaction with a loved one.
Romantic love can generate many powerful feelings. It can provide a profound ecstasy, and a deep suffering when frustrated. To some people, romantic love is irrational. Romantic love can seem like an emotional storm.
Despite these experiences, people are still drawn to something they seldom reach. It is a profound longing. A desire that is difficult to extinguish. Romantic love is not something that must crumble when faced with practical realities. Romantic love is not something just for youth.
Romantic love is the desire to be seen, valued and understood, when we encounter a person, strange but seems mysteriously familiar, who notices us, look at us and value us, we experience a strong feeling of contact with that person. When we start feeling loved, we start showing them the real us, the one hidden inside the core, the real self, that we unleash only in front of that person.
Romantic love makes us see each other in a unique way; we experience each other in a deeper and more complete way than any other relationship, which evokes feelings of warmth and spiritual attachment.
However, it is very important to understand the movement of rhythm and energy in both individuals involved in a relationship.  This rhythm and energy is deeply connected to whether or not romantic love actually ignites or endures. Rhythm and energy can be observed in our speech patterns, emotional responses and body language. Closely related is the observation that some people are naturally more or less energetic than others – -physically, emotionally or intellectually. Some people move, feel, think faster or slower depending on the circumstance and their environment. Some people are impulsive or impatient. The person who is naturally fast and eagerly explores life may feel chronically impatient with a person who savors life at a slower pace. The person with a less fevered pace may feel chronically pressured. It’s always important to enjoy, accept and appreciate the differences between two persons to keep the relationship happy and healthy.
Romantic love gives birth to a personal universe, share by two people. This universe can be shared with silent understandings, unspoken words, humorous signals, and focused glances.  Conversations and physical contact become wondrous, exciting and safe.

Yoga for Better and Great Sex

In ancient times yogis practiced celibacy in an effort to channel all of their energy toward spiritual advancement. It kinda makes you wonder how these devilishly wise guys could have gotten it so wrong. Today yoga lovers are finding that more time on the mat means more—and steamier—time spent reveling in the pleasures of their tightly toned bodies without any of those tantric contortions you may have heard of. To take a walk on yoga's carnal side, add these easy moves to your routine. Or just do them by themselves to turn up the heat in your bedroom.
Bringing Flexy Back
Having more flexible muscles and joints definitely helps you assume those compromising positions and hold them comfortably too. Opening your hips in particular increases your range of motion in the nether regions, allowing for more direct stimulation in just the right spots. After all, one micro-movement in missionary is sometimes all it takes to ring the bell.
Hot yoga: Bound angle pose (baddha konasana) 
In a seated position, bring the soles of your feet together and grab your ankles, allowing your knees to relax toward the floor. Then hinge forward from your hips as far as is comfortable, keeping your spine long and back flat. Hold for 10 to 15 slow breaths.
Perfect Your Pelvic Prowess
You've likely heard of Kegels and maybe your yoga teacher even talks about engaging your mula bandha—different terms for the same strengthening move that works one key muscle that increases your ability to engage and lift the pelvic floor. That brings you more control and sensation down there when you want it.
Hot yoga: Root lock (mula bandha)
You can do this seated or standing by simply contracting and then releasing the muscle located between your pubic bone and tailbone, as if you wanted to stop the flow of urine. You can even do this at your desk, squeezing and releasing, say, 10 times, at three workday intervals, priming the pump for evening engagements.
Yogini Staying Power
Vigorous, shake-the-headboard sex is a strenuous workout. "The better shape you are in, the more pleasure you have with sex and the longer you can do it," says Kimberly Fowler, owner and founder of Yoga and Spinning Studio in Venice, California.
Hot yoga: Yoga pushups
Start in the plank position, arms extended. Engage your abs as you lower your body slowly to low pushup (chaturanga). Stop when your torso is about 2 to 3 inches away from the floor. Keep your elbows in, shoulders away from your ears, and collarbone broad, as you hold there for five breaths then lower to the floor. Repeat three times, building up to five.
Reboot to Knock Boots
A killer day at work can leave you too beat to boink. But a few minutes of nonstrenuous yoga when you get home can turn another night with Netflix into an erotic evening entwined with your mate.
Hot yoga: Legs-up-the-wall pose (viparita karani) 
Change into some yoga-friendly clothes and take 5 minutes for this pose. Lie on your back with one hip touching a wall, then swing your legs up and turn your body to face the wall. Rest your legs against it from heels to butt, arms at your side or alongside your ears. Bring your awareness to your breath and just follow it without changing it for 5 minutes. This position allows more oxygen-rich blood to flow from your lower body back up to the heart and the brain, so you'll get up reenergized, refocused, and ready to tumble.
Breath of Desire
While most poses simply help prepare you for a libidinous rendezvous, this breathing exercise can actually heighten your pleasure in flagrante.
Hot yoga: Breath of fire (kapalabhati pranayama)
While you're getting busy, add rapid, forceful, and rhythmic breaths through the nose with the mouth closed. Don't worry if your partner thinks you're hyperventilating; he'll forget all about it when you reach a spine-tingling climax.
Double Your Pleasure 
If your man does yoga too, sex can improve exponentially. Practicing together is like foreplay, says Jacquie Noelle Greaux, creator of the Better Sex Through Yoga video. "You start to breathe together, sweat together, and move together. It gets your energy synced up." Some mat work just might make him more sex-imaginative as well. "Yoga sparks creativity," Fowler says. "[In bed], women don't want bang-boom from a man, they want an explorer—and yoga invites you to explore."

Ways Your Physical Appearance Turns Her on

Your Physical Appearance Turns Her On

Your move: Meatheads may rule your gym, but in reality, women prefer muscle definition over muscle mass, according to a recent UCLA study. When 141 women evaluated photos of shirtless men, they ranked lean, athletic-looking bodies as more desirable than both bulky and skinny types. Study author David Frederick, Ph.D., says that women perceive men with big muscles as threatening and also know that it takes time to build all that brawn—time you might not spend with them. "They're looking for signs of not only health and fitness but also a potential commitment," he says. To sculpt a lean, chiseled body, follow these 5 easy steps to burn fat and reveal muscle.

How to make your husband fall hook?

Here we are not talking about a degree programmer but telling you guidelines to have a close bonding with your perfect man: husband and believe us these tips work like magic.

Follow these guidelines and watch your husband fall hook, line and sinker for you all over again.

This guideline suggests that for a perfect relationship, flirt with him, flutter those eyelashes, give him those flirty smiles and make him drool all over you again.

If you want him to worship you, you can prove to be irresistible to him, send him messages, slip naughty cards in his coat pocket and send him email to keep him hooked. If you dress up beautifully, your husband would be drooling all over you again making a lasting relationship.

The guideline suggest that let your imagination go wild, play like a wife, who is naughty and ready to roll the dice, whisper sweet words in his ear and be closer to him, believe us your man would become possessed by you.

This relationship, guideline suggest that always be naughty and look for short and spicy session as it gives instant gratifications. Your husband would be yours for life.

For a perfect woman, she has to show her love and care, open up with each other, give in to his longings and make him yours forever! A close relationship is based on support, encouragement and be a good listener and make the moment magical, just be indispensable to his needs.

A man loves woman who thinks about him all the time. Tell him to make a wish list and you make yours. Exchange it like a harmonious couple. Do dishes together, and get completely lost in each other. Woo your husband in style, give him a treat and he’ll treat you like a queen

According to this guideline, make your man relax and remember that he needs rest, so instead of reminding him about a Thai restaurant, simply give him a massage, which will relieve him of his worries. For a lasting bond soothe his sore muscles and he’ll smooth your life with a long eternal relationship.

Be passionate about your life and his work and your husband would love you. The passion will be there but the drama shouldn’t stop. There naughty guideline would wrap him around your finger and you’ll be living in a dream all your life.

How to Shop his Joys?

They say, ‘if you want to make him yours, buy him a present,’ here are some of the ideas for women to give their beloved a special gift which can be cherished for a lifetime.

There is a special joy in shopping a perfect gift for your ‘someone special.’ You don’t need to wait for an occasion to present your man with a present.  There is so much you can do to make your beloved love you even more…

It can be anything from a simple rose to a leather jacket; also women should treat their significant other to his favourite restaurant and order his favourite dish. After dinner, whip out your gift. Remember, you can never go wrong with a watch or perhaps a sentimental gift. A cute gesture would be incorporating inside jokes into your gift (or card) and remind him of memorable experiences you’ve both shared.

In order to make your relationship successful, give your man the ultimate gift of relaxation. Spas around the country offer packaged deals for special occasions including his and her massages. Women can plan ahead and RSVP as certain deals get filled quickly.

For a perfect relationship create an even more romantic and intimate session, massage your spouse in the comforts of your own home, for an anniversary is a straight and simple thing. You can give him a rose as a token of your love. In order to treat your significant other (man), you can take him to his favourite restaurant and order his favourite dish.

After dinner, whip out your gift. Remember, you can never go wrong with a watch or perhaps a sentimental gift. A cute gesture would be incorporating inside jokes into your gift (or card) and remind him of memorable experiences you’ve both shared.

Similarly, give your husband the ultimate gift of relaxation. Lastly, to create an even more romantic and intimate session, women should massage their men in the comforts of your own home.

Above all, love him with every single breathe…

Most Exciting Thing in Relationship: Seduction

Seduction has always been the most exciting thing in a relationship. The thrill of seduction sometimes lies in the chase rather than the conquest, the excitement of wanting and pursuing someone can give in itself a sense of satisfaction and craving at the same time. Such is the bitter sweet charm of seduction. However, at the end you do want him to fall hopelessly for you. Read on to know a few effective tips that will surely knock him off his feet.

When it comes to women, they love dressing up for their man, but when it comes to seducing men and make them crave till their throat, Show a little, but hide a little more! There’s always a way of dressing that drives men crazy. Something mysteriously sexy, sultry yet modest! When trying to make men want more, always try to feel sexy rather then look sexy. Trying-hard-to-look sexy evokes desperation that is a big turn off for most men. However feeling sexy is the perfect balance between showing and hiding your womanly qualities. You can enhance some of your body regions without actually showing anything.

The most important thing is ‘your fragrance’ which reflects your soul. The scent is one of the most powerful subconscious influences that affect our judgments. You can enhance your natural appeal with the power of fragrance. Use a perfume, which is charming and mysterious but make sure not to overdo it, and use the same perfume every time you meet your man so that it gets imprinted on his mind as a part of you. Use it sparingly on your body’s pulse points: wrist, behind your ears, in the bend of your elbow, behind your knees and on the inside of your ankle. You can also try to spray the perfume in the air in front of you and walk into the mist.

One of the most obvious seduction tips for women is that you have to be super confident on yourself when seducing a man. Be proud of what you are and what you do, feel special for men love this in a woman. They find it irresistible.

Action speaks louder than words when it coming to seducing men. Send him little signs of interest from time to time that make come forward. Such as show unclenched hands, play with your hair or caress other objects, pick some fluff of his jacket (even if there is none  face him directly and slightly lean forward every now and then, wet and bite your lips from time to time.

Men love the chase game, so keep the game tempting and irresistible. Delay the gratification,  Make two steps forward, and then one step back as anticipation, excitement and tension can be a huge turn-on for men. Contradict Yourself! Use the before mentioned signs of interest, then suddenly show disinterest, ignore him for two minutes. Then start again. Two steps forward, one step back.

Use the power of ‘killing eyes’ which includes a side long playful glance but the moment he looks at you lower your eyes and put on an embarrassed smile. Use the ‘playful innocence’ technique to woo your man to death! This is also flirting without talking, yet it’s far more killing and alluring.

Last but not the least, when you reach for something, try to accidently touch his hand, but don’t make it too obvious. The secret is being whimsical and playful with casual touches now and then, which creates tension and also a physical connection.

However, there is a slightest difference between doing it and overdoing it. Make sure you keep the perfect balance between ‘subtle’ and ‘obvious’ he must not feel seduced rather he must think that he seduced you, not the other way around. Give him his victory and your victory is guaranteed!

How do they Romance with Chocolate?

Chocolate, the word itself creates a kinky feeling on tongue and it starts craving for at least a single bite of this irresistibly delicious bar of pure romance. Ahh! Forromance and chocolate are as inseparable as valentine and sweethearts. Chocolates are sexy, yummy and highly sensual sweet temptations.

Every single love filled bite when goes down your throat makes you indulge in a pleasure that makes you feel love, its raunchy bites play with your hormones and make love to them while you are lost in itspassionate fantasy. What is that thing that makes usfall in love with these highly pleasurable chocolates?

Science has proven the release of certain chemicals during moments of extreme pleasure, passion or lustand cause a euphoric effect on the person. These chemicals occur naturally in chocolates, that when enter your blood stream makes you feel ‘being in love’ kinda feeling.

The legendary combination of chocolate and passionate love goes back to the ancient Aztec culture where chocolatewas used as a stimulator to increase sexual desire and passion. It makes you crave for passionate romance and sex. Read on to know how the ultimate choco-magic can turn your simple man to oh-so-wild and passionate lover.

Melted dark chocolate mixed with some sweet peppers is the ultimate hot beverage that can make you go crazy for a steaming hot night with your partner. Some drops of dark chocolate syrup on his body will taste even more divine and delicious

You can do sweet little chocolaty tricks for your partner to make him feel happy and romantic. Lay a path of wrapped chocolates that leads to your bedroom and have a sexy treat waiting at the end.

You can write small love notes of chocolate. For example write ‘I love you’ with chocolate syrup on some dessert that you especially made for him.

During moments of romance and love making, you can feed each other divine chocolate bites with your mouth, the exotic fruity taste of cherry scented lip gloss on your lips when fused with magical aroma of chocolate will surely create flaming sparks in your love making session.

Chocolate may seem a small delicious bar packed inside a cute little wrapper but it can turn out to be so raunchy and sexy that you may not have imagined before for this rich heavenly bar got the amazing power to show you a whole new world ofpassion and romance.

Miley Cyrus and Joshua Bowman Love Birds

Teen superstar Miley Cyrus seems to have fallen for her ‘So Undercover’ co-star Joshua Bowman.

The two were spotted getting cozy during a day out atGriffith Park in Los Angeles on Sunday afternoon.Joshua, wearing a hoodie was seen cuddling with Miley, who was lying between his legs. The ‘Hannah Montana’ actress was cradling her puppy and grinning from ear to ear as she got a kiss from him on her forehead.

Moreover, Miley and Joshua seemed inseparable during the wrap party of ‘So Undercover’ although sources insisted Miley is single. However, the newly obtained pictures of the park picnic seem to prove otherwise.

Love Relationship Revival Day

Valentine day is the time to re live and revive your love relationship. This special and romance filled day brings lot of love and romantic ideas to lovers to strengthen their existing love relationship.

Once again valentine day is coming forth. It is the best time for lovers to express their love, romance and intimate feelings in a very unique and different way. Lovers all over the whole year wait for the valentine day in order to give more attention, expression and love to their love partner.

Love is the most powerful feelings of human being. Everybody has an instinct of love and to be a loved one of any body. Every one of us wants a loving relationship once in our life that will be long lasting. A loving relationship makes us more contented, generous, humble and kind not even with our love partner but with others also.

As valentine day is approaching nearer, the lovers preparing themselves to celebrate the valentine’s aroma with full zeal and zest. Beside all these valentine day celebration, valentine day is the day to revive or to strengthen your love relationship. It is the time when you and your love partner need extra love and romance of each other to strengthen your love and relationship.

Here are some valentine day ideas for those who want to strengthen their love relationships on this valentine day in a very unique and special way.

Valentine day ideas to strengthen your love relationships:

1. The first valentine idea is, when the day of valentine begins, you need to create a love ambiance around your surroundings. For this, you have to feel the real aroma/feelings of love for your love partner. You can start your valentine’s day by presenting a special red rose to your love partner as red rose is the best and utmost symbol of true love. By presenting a red rose to your love partner you can fill his/her heart with real joy of valentine day.


2. The second valentine idea is to make a surprise valentine’s breakfast for your partner. This unusual and surprising valentine’s breakfast not only create love ambiance but also strengthen your love relationship.


3. Present a special valentine gift to your love partner to strengthen your relationship. Gifts are the real sign of intimacy and the only way to strengthen your love relationships. Choose a special valentine gift as per your partner’s choice, taste, personality and liking and disliking.


4. Valentine is the day of expressing love, love and love. So don’t go for bad things and avoid remembering worse things you ever had in your relationship.
   Every relationship has difficulties in it. Valentine day demands love and romantic memories so forget the past and cherish your romantic moments to enjoy the present and to strengthen your love relationship.


5. Another special valentine idea is to decorate your bed room in a surprise way. Fill your bed room with bunches of red roses or you can also welcome your partner by carpeting your bed room with red roses. It will create a love ambiance in your room and also filled your heart with love and joy which is very essential to strengthen your love relationship.


6. After a lovable and memorable valentine day you have to end your unforgettable valentine day with a candle light dinner with full of red roses around your valentine table. Make some special dishes which your partner likes much. Ends your valentine day on a very special and lovely dinner so that you can remember this valentine day thorough out the whole day as a revival day of your love relationship.


7. Just follow our these valentine ideas to bring real joy of love in your relationship and also to strengthen your relationship.

Tips to Know He's Cheating on You

Check if your partner is cheating on you in your relationship or not?

Are you happy in your relationship with your partner? If your answer is no, have you ever tried to figure out what is the cause of it? If you think you partner is cheating on you and is not loyal to you i your relationship then here are some simple tips to catch someone who is cheating in a relationship.

Trust is the basis of all relationship and when you lose faith and trust in your relationship you definitely need to do something about it. If you are sure your partner is cheating on you in your relationship, first of all what you need to decide is what do you want from the relationship now? Would be able to believe in the relationship even after you know the truth or not?

When you have decided for yourself the next step is to find out if your partner is cheating on your or not. Some simple and easy ways of finding a person who is cheating in a relationship are by hiring a private investigator that just asks for money and gives you results which decide the fate of your relationship.

Apart from spending money on the private investigator there is yet another way of finding out for who is your partner cheating in your relationship. Find out the number on which your partner is calling and perfume a reverse phone number lookup to find out who is the owner of the number.

Yet again you think something is going wrong in your relationship? Do you often think of taking a break from the relationship? Do you think your partner is cheating on you? Just plan a trap trip? Go away for a while have your break and mean while stay around to spy. Soon you will know what went wrong in your relationship was it just a misunderstanding or did your partner actually cheated on you.

This century’s advantage is you can keep a check on all the gadgets you partner uses especially the computer. You just need to install some software and keep a track of what your partner is up to. It’s always better to keep a relationship healthy than keeping up with it when nothing seems to be working.

Last but not the least; check your relationship through a friend of the same sex to try to trap your partner. This can be risky for your relationship so be very careful while you plan this on out.

Kiss and Tell Method

Just how much do single men really talk about their various sexual encounters and if so just how much of the salacious sexual dirt gets spilled on the down and dirty of what happens between the sheets, or a sweaty one night stand the way it can only happen in the back seat of a car?

Do men kiss and tell?

In my gut I had a feeling that this kiss and tell investigation could potentially be a taboo territory for a woman to venture into, a sometimes confidential man’s society that I wasn’t privy to, unless I sleep with Man #1. See below for reference.

Early the next day I sent out an email to twenty-two of my handsome and sexually active male friends to dish on the kiss and tell topic.

I was surprised by the lack of response I did make me wonder were my suspicions being confirmed, was I in fact roaming into a no-mans land where no women dares to roam? I could almost see and feel myself walking across the icy slippery fields of the Antarctica fighting off the extreme forty below temps, harsh winds, and wearing no down parka.

And as I herd the deafening sound of crickets coming from my computer within a few days only six men responded out of the twenty-two. Hey, maybe my friends are in high demand and too busy?

Enough said I will let these six informative e-mails, typos and all speak for themselves.

MAN #1
Him- I can only give this info in person and between the sheets....
Me- is that a bribe?
Him- Yes...

MAN #2
Him-Depends on how good she is!
Me-if she sucks mums the word?
Him-Also depends on the guy... A true "playa" won't need to say anything, because everyone knows if he goes out with a girl... They're having sex.

MAN #3
Him-Hey!
As you know :) I do chat with (you mostly)
girlfriends about sex but not really at all with my
guy friends (except the usual..."we have lots of sex
etc.")

Man #4
Him-J-
I don't know about kiss and tell, I would like to know the study of women who hold out on their men and why....

MAN #5
I have some ideas. Need to think about it.
xox
Jennifer,
I’m 53 so I believe it is a function of age, character and maturity. The younger you are, the more you reveal about explicit activities beneath the sheets. Due in large part to a young man’s own need to brag to male friends about his conquests in explicit detail. As you get older in your 30’s and 40’s, it generally depends on the “type” of friend you feel you wish to convey such detailed information – men or women. And, once older you tend to have more female friends as well to “maybe” discuss sexual conquests, but usually on a limited or restricted basis, knowing how much to say and not to embarrass anyone. Unless, she inquires and asks detailed questions, such as “Did you go down on her?” Then it is a simple yes or no. So it also depends on the female or male friend to ask the questions or initiate the discussion.

Moving into your 50’s, it is rare (at least for me) to “kiss and tell.” Other than a simple comment to either a female or male friend something like, “I got laid last night” - but in the case of a female, it depends on your relationship. I have a number of female friends, but don’t discuss intimate details as a matter of courtesy and keeping my own intimate details to myself. Unless, they inquire and initiate the sexual conversation. Then, I will tend to reveal more but most likely keep it limited.

First Before Breasts

Good news for those of us with lingerie drawers full of push-up bras! It’s not your cleavage he's looking at instead of your face...it's your hair! According to Glamour, a new survey found that what men really want is silky, healthy hair. The hard numbers:

74% of men indicated that they notice women because of their hair.

44% of men surveyed said that hair is the first thing they notice about a woman, more than her clothes (26%), legs (25%), or makeup (4%), and most men surveyed would be more likely to approach a woman at a bar with great hair than a woman wearing a low-cut shirt.

82% of men indicated that sexy hair is a key element to a woman's overall sex appeal.

60% of men surveyed say they would rather date a woman with great hair than a woman with big breasts.

78% of men surveyed consider healthy hair to be a turn-on.

But wait...I thought we were taught that we can have it all! Love and a career. Great hair and great boobs! Now we have to choose?

Led by Pantene, the survey is hardly impartial, but do men really care about hair this much? According to Steve Ward (of VH1 Tough Love fame) yes! "Anyone can wear a low-cut blouse, but not everyone can have great hair," he tells TalkingMakeup.com. Anyone! Steve can wear a low-cut blouse, I bet.

Your hair also talks to Steve, and to all men. Says Steve: "Hair that is healthy and well-kept immediately signals to a man that you are responsible, classy, attentive, and take pride in your appearance and these are all characteristics that men look for in women." Responsible! Maybe your hair should have a resume. Besides, if good hair tells men that you are responsible and classy, what does bad hair tell them? (Sometimes mine says "I was eating Doritos earlier and got some crumbs in my hair.")

Ladies, what do you think: Does your guy really prefer your locks to everything else about you—maybe including your personality?—or does this study simplify their whims and preferences? 

Are You Sex Addict?

Am I a sex addict, or just promiscuous?

Doctors with the American Psychiatric Association are considering the validity of this very question as they prepare the DSM-V, slated for publication in 2012. Because the word "addiction" doesn't appear in DSM-IV -- "dependence" or "abuse" are the preferred terms in reference to compulsive habitual behavior -- sex addiction would appear in the DSM-V under the moniker "hyper sexual disorder," according to Dr. Robert Weiss, founding director of The Sexual Recovery Institute and director of Sexual Disorders Services at The Ranch Treatment Center and Promises Treatment Centers.

Sex addiction is defined as "any sexually related, compulsive behavior which interferes with normal living and causes severe stress on family, friends, loved ones and one's work environment," according to Patrick Carnes, the author of the pioneering 1983 book "Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction" and creator of the websiteSexHelp. But not everyone is buying this vague, perhaps outdated definition. With celebrities like Russel Brand, Lindsay Lohan, David Duchovny and Tiger Woods making headlines with confessions of sexual compulsion, critics wonder, is sex addiction a legitimate psychiatric disorder or an excuse for bad behavior?

In researching this article many of my peers, mostly city-dwellers in their mid-20s and 30s, seem particularly glib on the subject. "I've actually considered scoping the SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous) meetings for horny hotties," says Jack*, an attractive 28-year-old New Yorker who works in graphic arts. "Could you imagine 'Hump For the Cure' t-shirts?" jokes Lee, a 37-year-old private chef in Atlanta. "But seriously, when I go out, it's with one intention: to hook up. I don't think that makes me a sex addict." When I press Lee further, asking if alcohol and drugs go hand-in-hand with hooking up, he tells me, "Of course!"

Inadvertently, Lee makes a good point. State-altering substances and sex -- or the lure of it, anyway -- are both staples of nightlife, suggesting that sex addiction is only part of person's greater pathology. Because people are so complex, a good shrink will usually use the "mixed bag" approach in diagnosis. Respectively, people who exhibit sexual compulsion are often also diagnosed with substance dependency, bipolar disorder or various types of personality disorders. For this reason, it's hard to isolate sex addiction as a condition that progresses physiologically, one vital criterion for inclusion in the DSM, based largely on a medical or physiological model. For example, anorexia nervosa is recognized as a psychiatric disorder due to the physiological and medical conditions that arise from the compulsion not to eat. However, to diagnose anorexia nervosa solely on physiological and medical criteria seems reductive, especially given the amount of research citing the psychosocial causes of the condition.

Within the medical model, there's a case to be made for the hyper sexual diagnosis. Brain plasticity, the widely-accepted belief that the brain can change and develop at any age and, in doing so, shape our personality, supports the claim that hypersexuality can progress physiologically. When people give into compulsions, pleasure centers in the brain release euphoric chemicals like serotonin and dopamine. Repeated release of neural chemicals flooding the brain creates physical dependency. As the addict pursues compulsive behavior, these neural pathways get reinforced -- making sexual behavior as addictive as street drugs. In addition, the risks of STIs and STDs among sexual compulsives stand to be higher than the risks of non-hypersexuals. More than that, the mind-body connection is perhaps in one of its most heightened states when people are engaged in the sexual act.

With diagnosis comes treatment. Brain plasticity suggests relief for people wanting to break the cycle of sexual compulsive behavior, in that just as these neural pathways are created, they can be re-routed with behavioral therapy and/or medication.

Curious to see what your sexual habits say about you? Take the Sexual Addiction Screening Test or SAST, an assessment tool that has been used since 1983 to help determine if sex addiction is a problem. Or, consider these confessions of people who self-identify as sex addicts:

• An attorney in San Francisco, Roberta, 31, calls herself a sexual compulsive. She describes the rush she feels when seeking out a sexual conquest. "What turns me on more than sex is the seduction, the anticipation, the danger of picking up a man and seeing where it will lead, which most of the time, is his bed."


• A 37-year-old New York waiter, Glenn, admits to dozens of one-night-stands per month, and, though the lifestyle leaves him depressed and "feeing alone," he continues to live it. "I can't stand to think of a woman after I've slept with her. I like to erase the whole memory and move on to the next. This makes me sound cruel, but I'm actually a nice guy."


• Shelia, 30, a single New York grad-student, complains to her friends about not having a boyfriend but continues to sleep with unavailable men. "It's like moth to the flame. I continually become involved with men who don't give me what I really want. Rather than break things off, I'll become super sexual with them, which makes me feel like an idiot. I know I'm acting something out here."


• Clair, 29, works in retail in New York and can't stand to go home alone. "I once had sex with my cab driver because the guy I was with earlier had dissed me. That's pretty pathetic and could have been really dangerous."

An advocate for the inclusion of hyper sexual disorder in the DSM-V, Dr. Weiss explains, "When persistent emotional and psychiatric problems lack a formal name or diagnosis, they can quickly become the stuff of subjective moral judgment." Moral objection to research into human sexuality is nothing new. As a culture, we're caught in a messy cycle of denying, exploiting, and enjoying our sexuality. Attempts to fully examine sexuality -- its variations and taboos will always make some people blush. A shame, considering that sex education has only saved lives and significantly improved the way we experience ourselves.

*Names have been changed to protect the identities of people mentioned in this article.

Who you'll date before The One...

Not many of us are lucky enough to find true love right out of the gate. Meeting the person with whom you’re meant to spend the rest of your life takes time and maturity -- and chances are you will go through more than a few not-quite-right guys. We’ve put together a list of the most common types of guys women date before meeting Mr. Right.

THE ANGSTY LONER
Many women meet Bachelor Number One when they're in high school or college. He's usually a little older and he's in a band, or maybe he's an artist. He keeps to himself, but he seems like the coolest guy you've ever met.  He writes poetry and reads philosophy. For the first little while, you're enamored by how smart and worldly he is compared to guys your own age.

Pros: You feel cool and interesting just being around him. He's pretty sexy in that dark, brooding kind of way, and he lets you wear his perfectly beaten-up leather jacket.

Cons:  He's actually pretty immature. Everything you do is on his terms, and he blames the "establishment" for everything.

THE GOOD-ON-PAPER GUY
This guy has all the attributes of a guy you can and should bring home to Mom, but something is missing. He's usually a nice guy with a well paying job. He owns property and a dog, and just wants to make you happy. He cooks, cleans and reminds you to call your mother, but still, you aren't completely certain he's the guy for you.

Pros: He will drive you or pick you up from anywhere. Your mom loves him. He always has a stocked fridge and clean towels, and his dog is pretty cute.

Cons: He's actually a little bit boring. He lectures you about finances and wonders why you're not more serious about investing. In truth, he reminds you a little of your dad.

THE JERK OR "BAD BOY"
You wouldn't think any smart, sane woman would fall for a guy who turns out to a be a jerk, but we all do it. This is the guy with a bit of an edge. You know deep down that he isn't right for you, but you are very attracted to him -- and the sex... well, le'ts just say you're not complaining about it. There is passion, but not a whole lot of anything else or any hope of moving the relationship forward. He doesn't show affection, and in the end, causes more heartache than he's worth.

Pros: Great sex, lots of passion, initial excitement

Cons: He never tells you he loves you. When you suggest moving in together, he laughs. He is emotionally unavailable.
THE ONE WHO WON'T COMMIT
We usually meet this guy shortly before we meet The One. The guy who won't commit starts off very promising. The relationship has passion and intrigue, as well as camaraderie and friendship. You can have great sex and then a great conversation. You feel alive and in love. When the time comes to move in together or talk about marriage, however, he freaks out and eventually has to leave.
Pros: Great guy, almost Mr. Right
Cons: Can't commit despite your best intentions

Tips for Hotter Sex

Have you been feeling like things are less than stellar in the sack lately? We're guessing you're not alone. According to the most recent AskMen.com Great Male Survey, 38 percent of respondents agreed that though satisfied with their sex lives, there is room for improvement. Every relationship has highs and lows where sex is concerned and even though sexual slumps may not be ideal, they do happen. If you think your time between the sheets needs a wake-up call, check out our guide to better sex in five days.

JUST SAY YES

Long day at work? Still need to respond to countless emails? Couch calling your name? We've all been there, when the last thing on our minds is sex. But that doesn't mean putting on your sweats and fixing your man with a "don't even think about it" look is the only answer.

Day one on our 5-day path to better sex means saying yes when you're tempted to say no. You can lounge on the couch all your want afterwards, but today your homework is to just say yes and see what happens. You might be surprised by the fact that you don't have to feel like ripping your guy's clothes off to enjoy sex. The intimacy involved can be enough to get you in the mood. We're not suggesting you acquiesce every time your man wants to get busy, but sometimes it can be beneficial to both of you if you remain open to the idea of sex, rather than closing yourself off.

DITCH ROUTINE

Today is all about forcing yourself out of the box when it comes to sex. Whether you get frisky on the same day every week, for the same amount of time, in the same position – or all three, this is your chance to break free from routine for a day to see what a big difference doing things differently can make if you're hoping to spice up your sex life. 

We've put together some fun and easy ways to put an end to bedroom boredom.

EMBRACE THE QUICKIE

Slow and sensual is great, but not all of us have time for that. Scratch that – most of us don'thave time for that so unless you're on vacation with all the time in the world for sex, you're going to have to compromise.

That being said, the quickie can be a great way to maintain an active, healthy sex life without feeling like you have to devote an entire evening to the act. And contrary to what you might think, they can actually be pretty hot. The key to the quickie is finding a time when both of you are likely to be in the mood. When NOT to try for a quickie: After a big meal, after a stressful day at work. When TO try for a quickie: On a lazy Sunday morning, instead of doing something tedious like grocery shopping, right before you go out for dinner or to a party.

ADD NEW ELEMENTS

This can be a tough one if you are at all intimidated by the idea of sex toys, role playing, sex games or opening up about any fantasies you might have.  But trust us when we tell you that one of the best and fastest ways to kick your sex life up a few notches is by adding new and unexpected elements.  Here are some rules to go by when adding in something new and potentially intimidating.

CELEBRATE EACH OTHER

Sex is many things – passionate, intimate, emotional outlet and a way to become closer to your partner. Most importantly though, sex is a means of really celebrating each other and showing appreciation for everything you have together. It may sound contrived or cheesy, but thinking about sex in this way helps take the pressure off. It can be easy to feel stressed about sex – are you adventurous enough, do you have sex often enough, is he happy, are you happy – it's enough to drive a person crazy. So instead of succumbing to that kind of anxiety, treat sex as simply part of your relationship and a great way to continue boosting your bond.